Devious Journal Entry(every day; every word, i care for you less, & less, &less; you push me into the arms of all your ex-friends & -lovers. soon i'm going to go + you'll pick up the phone & punch dead numbers + you'll drive your car here & i will have moved far, far away. you'll fix your hair + crack yr knuckles + you'll live out your flat life; you'll wake up one morning with no knowledge of how to pump air into your chest. that comfortable bourgeious terror. i hope you marry young, & all your dreams fall to pieces in your thin hands. i have never been this alive.)
Newest
risk.you choke on it;risk.
you raise the lip of the glass to your own & drink until you drown, swallow the loose ends down.
cutting back on romance, like people swear to do away with cigarettes. crumpling packets, pressing one more to my mouth and swearing alright, one last time. you can't help it, when everyone's so willing just to hand you one, in a bar or a backyard, sneaking around corners to indulge and crushing out the evidence; we leave lipstick ash between the sheets.
i held your hand; your fingers grazed the small of my back in a gesture so intimate i
by ~yousaid
one + two a.m.i know you,one + two a.m.
you still listen to the songs that remind you of the long nights.
that pitch that paints a
picture of my arms balancing on my head, facing open windowed streets with cigarette smoke wrapping itself around the curtains, forcing itself through the flyscreen; ash descending to meet floorboard.
we were all effortless, once. once we drank freely from the deep well of melody, once we crafted every word of our own image. once it never took me more than a mere second to write a poem; then an hour; then a d
by ~yousaid
jet black,,when sad never had to mean forever; when sick meant until your temperature went back down. this is bullshit man and i don't want it, i'm sick of cold + shakes + wasting away. & his eyes say he takes the blame but i don't even have a second to spare on him, all my time is spent holding these lungs in my chest and going through all the mundane shit, all the basic processes of life to get from a to b and to keep myself upright + ready to run. i have always found the most basic things in life to be excruciatingly difficult.jet black,,
by ~yousaid
12,12your lover holds you down like a fever, & every night you to try to sweat her out.12,12
you are six years seven months eight days. broken backs & dirty throats, a table scattered with
six packets of cigarettes.
["all i want is just one", you say and dig your fingers into the cardboard,
crumpling them + throwing up your hands and the
contents of your pockets on to the table; the two of you find
gold coins enough for one more pack,
shrug sheepishly & hand over the notes and swig from a &n
by ~yousaid
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Devious Info
- Current Residence: oz
- Interests: love chivalrous & grand.
- Favourite movie: requiem, trainspotting, sylvia, girl interrupted, waking life
- Favourite band or musician: joanna newsom, ani d., mirah, joy division, bright eyes, the smiths, sigur rós, cat power!!,
- Favourite genre of music: things with strings & voices
- Favourite artist: dali, kandinsky, holzer,
- Favourite poet or writer: adrienne rich, william carlos williams, sylvia plath, ani t., e.e. cummings
- Operating System: fatal kind of charm
- Skin of choice: never my own
- Favourite game: paper scissor something
- Personal Quote: everything was beautiful & nothing hurt - kurt vonnegut
- Tools of the Trade: i look incredible on paper.
- Website: http://only-distance.livejournal.com
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so, regardless of your lack of posts, i want to watch you anyway.
i hope you can get back on here soon and start sharing again.
--
i said i was wearing black so you could
see me against the sky
--
acid goes to your head;
ecstasy goes to your heart
Peace&Love
write more!
--
we were like stars, you know.
chanel and cigarettes
in the moon-milked sky.
~UglyGargoyle379
--
The first word was 'dream'.
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